 Merry XXXmas, motherfuckers!
posted by timothy on Wednesday, December 24, 2003
It's kind of sad that a) I've been too busy to update this more than I have this last week or so, and b) the most entertaining email I get these days tends to be spam: Subject: Bukkake barn house
Bukkake barn house
The Bukkake Barn House the most perverse
camshots seen on the internet. They're
definitely bad.
Don't miss this one.
Banned in 17 countries!
See this here:
http://flesh.8gAflV3.60zSre73U.starterz.net/bukkake/index.html
Delete from baze
http://apple.3VOhYF.al5aea0M8g.starterz.net/index.html
thousand visit gate begins described,
fancied silent irritated, dark was lamps.
discovered law knelt temple power, lid youd.
station rust age scolded steamships:
http://www.lessonvbookscoach.com/railing/index.html
going lose whistling staircases ramparts swim.
shape airs, little two insult stirring needle?
slippery visible almost, advance hopped
pig bah, axes brilliant acted africa.
wane cold scratching side simply christian inborn.
posted by timothy on Tuesday, December 23, 2003
More spam I love / can't understand: Tomorrow is promised to nobody.
Get God in your life today.
Call a prayer line or contact a local churh today,
you will be glad you did.
I mean, that's great and all, but who profits from this? This was literally sent out to save my soul / waste my time. Weird.
posted by timothy on Wednesday, December 17, 2003
Steve sent this review of Return Of The King to me on Friday and I'm still laughing, so I thought I'd share: Whenever cool movie series get to the third movie they suck dicks like they’re trying to become Emperor of Dicksuck-ylvania. George Lucas had Star Wars, and then Empire Kicks Ass, and then all of a sudden it’s Planet of Furry Faggoty Fuckheads. Then he had to make two more to feed the Suck Demon that was holding his children hostage, and those movies went beyond gay to where they’re paying old people to take a dump on them.
Even this summer, with MATRIX: SUDDENLY GAY and TERMINATOR: I LOVE COCK, the Rule of the Suck-y Third Movie got re-proven. If the third X-Men movie had come out this summer it probably would have been some crippled crock of crap where Wheelchair Charlie traps Fuck Yeah Wolverine in an illusion mind-trap where Wolverine thinks he’s a time traveler from a hundred years ago romancing Meg Ryan in right-now New York. Of course, the X-Men movie would try to redeem itself in the third act by having Wolverine realize it’s a mind-illusion and cut Meg’s head off and play dodgeball with it, but it would be too late and here comes my extra large Sprite at the screen.
Set the Homophobic attitude off to the side for a minute, and I've never read a more perfect review of the Star Wars movies. This guy hits the nail right on the head, and he does it in two sentences. I didn't bother reading the rest of the review because I'm gonna see it tonight anyway but, goddamn, that made me laugh.
posted by timothy on Tuesday, December 16, 2003
 Some seriously great pics from the Hubble telescope.
posted by timothy on Friday, December 12, 2003
Howard just sent this to me. I'm posting it because of it's relation to two posts down: Foes of Bush Enlist Google in Group Prank
By SAUL HANSELL, The New York Times
Earlier this year, Google started a widely used news service. Last week, it looked to some users of the Google search that the site had started to editorialize.
Anyone searching on Google for the phrase "miserable failure" was sent to the official White House biography of President Bush.
Google executives say they have no corporate opinion of the Bush presidency. Instead, the episode is another example of a form of cyber-graffiti known as "Google bombing."
It is a group prank. If enough Web pages link a certain Web page to a phrase, the Google search engine will start to associate that page with the phrase - even if, as in the case of Mr. Bush's official biography, the phrase does not occur on the destination Web site.
Beginning a few months ago, for example, the No. 1 search result on Google for the term "weapons of mass destruction" has been a satiric Web page made to look like a Microsoft error message.
Inspired by this and stirred by his objections to Mr. Bush's policies, a computer programmer, George Johnston, created a Google bomb to tie Mr. Bush's official biography to the phrase "miserable failure," watchwords of the presidential campaign of Richard A. Gephardt. (Mr. Johnston, who lives in Bellevue, Wash., said he had no association with the Gephardt campaign and in fact preferred another Democratic candidate, Dennis J. Kucinich.)
In the middle of October, Mr. Johnston created links on his blog (oldfashionedpatriot.blogspot.com) tying the phrase to the Bush biography and began to send messages to the writers of other blogs with an anti-Bush tilt telling them of his project. Many not only added the catch phrase to their own sites but urged readers to do the same.
Craig Silverstein, Google's director for technology, says the company sees nothing wrong with the public using its search engine this way. No user is hurt, he said, because there is no clearly legitimate site for "miserable failure" being pushed aside.
Moreover, he said, Google's results were taking stock of the range of opinions that are expressed online. "We just reflect the opinion on the Web,'' he said, "for better or worse."
posted by timothy on Monday, December 08, 2003
This was just sent to me from Kenny: Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties and local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink from any woman. A date rape drug on the market called "Beer" is used by many females to target unsuspecting men. The drug is generally found in liquid form and is now available almost anywhere. It comes in bottles, cans, from taps and in large "kegs." Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and have sex with them. Typically, a woman needs only to persuade a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then simply ask him home for no strings attached sex. Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several Beers, men will often succumb to desires to perform sexual acts on horrific looking women to whom they would never normally be attracted. After drinking Beer men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that: "something bad" occurred.. At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's savings, in a familiar scam known as "a relationship." It has been reported that in extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer term form of servitude and punishment referred to as "marriage."
Apparently, men are much more susceptible to this scam after Beer is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females. Please forward this warning to every male you know. If you fall victim to this insidious Beer and the predatory women administering it, there are male support groups with venues in every town where you can discuss the details of your shocking enounter in an open and frank manner with similarly affected, like-minded guys. For the support group nearest you, just look up "Golf Courses" in the yellow pages.
posted by timothy on Saturday, December 06, 2003
Tom just showed this to me. Go to google.com and type in "miserable failure" and hit the "I'm Feeling Lucky" button.
posted by timothy on Saturday, December 06, 2003
I just heard that Roy Disney has resigned from The Walt Disney Company. Posted here, is his resignation in it's entirety: November 30, 2003
Mr. Michael D. Eisner, Chairman
The Walt Disney Company
500 South Buena Vista Street
Burbank, CA 91521
Dear Michael:
It is with deep sadness and regret that I send you this letter of resignation from the Walt Disney Company, both as Chairman of the Feature Animation Division and as Vice Chairman of the Board of Directors.
You well know that you and I have had serious differences of opinion about the direction and style of management in the company in recent years. For whatever reason, you have driven a wedge between me and those I work with even to the extent of requiring some of my associates to report my conversations and activities to you. I find this intolerable.
Finally, you discussed with the Nominating Committee of the Board of Directors its decision to leave my name off the slate of directors to be elected in the coming year, effectively muzzling my voice on the Board – much as you did with Andrea Van de Kamp last year.
Michael, I believe your conduct has resulted from my clear and unambiguous statements to you and the Board of Directors that after 19 years at the helm you are no longer the best person to run the Walt Disney Company. You had a very successful first 10-plus years at the company in partnership with Frank Wells, for which I salute you. But since Frank’s untimely death in 1994, the company has lost its focus, its creative energy, and its heritage.
As I have said, and as Stanley Gold has documented in letters to you and other members of the Board, this Company under your leadership has failed during the last seven years in many ways:
1. The failure to bring back ABC prime time from the ratings abyss it has been in for years and your inability to program successfully the ABC Family Channel. Both of these failures have had, and I believe will continue to have, significant adverse impact on shareholder value.
2. Your consistent micro-management of everyone around you with the resulting loss of morale throughout this company.
3. The timidity of your investments in our theme park business. At Disney’s California Adventure, Paris, and now Hong Kong, you have tried to build parks on the cheap and they show it and the attendance figures reflect it.
4. The perception by our stakeholders – consumers, investors, employees, distributors and suppliers – that the Company is rapacious, soul-less, and always looking for the “quick buck” rather than long-term value which is leading to a loss of public trust.
5. The creative brain drain of the last several years, which is real and continuing, and damages our Company with the loss of every talented employee.
6. Your failure to establish and build constructive relationships with creative partners, especially Pixar, Miramax, and the cable companied distributing our products.
7. Your consistent refusal to establish a clear succession plan.
In conclusion, Michael, it is my sincere belief that it is you who should be leaving and not me. Accordingly, I once again call for your resignation or retirement. The Walt Disney Company deserves fresh, energetic leadership at this challenging time in its history just as it did in 1984 when I headed a restructuring which resulted in your recruitment to the Company.
I have and will always have an enormous allegiance and respect for this Company, founded by my uncle, Walt, and father, Roy, and to our faithful employees and loyal stockholders. I don’t know if you and other directors can comprehend how painful it is for me and the extended Disney family to arrive at this decision.
In accordance with Item 6 of Form 8-K and Item 7 of Schedule 14A, I request that you disclose this letter and that you file a copy of this letter as an exhibit to a Company Form 8-K.
With sincere regrets,
Roy E. Disney
Cc: Board of Directors
Annette and I have been to Disneyland a lot lately and, I have to say, one quick walk around Tomorrowland will confirm everything Mr. Disney has to say regarding the theme park business. I grew up with Disneyland, my family went four or five times a year and it's sad to see certain areas of it failing. The resignation of Roy Disney is equally sad, I sincerely hope that it effects some sort of change, and soon.
posted by timothy on Tuesday, December 02, 2003
More spam I feel compelled to share:
Hey, how's it going?
My buddies and I wanted to build a website dedicated to M.I.LF's. You know what MILF's are, right? Mothers I'd Like to Fuck! We're talking sexy, older babes that you'd give your left nut to fuck. We're just average guys but we had an idea, a little cash and a camera. We went on a search of sexy M.I.L.F.'s that needed cock. You know, the type that are neglected by their husbands. We hit the supermarkets, shopping malls, playgrounds, beach, anywhere we could find some sexy mom's that we could talk into having sex with us on camera.
You know what? It was a HUGE success! I couldn't believe what these sexy mom's were willing to do. It didn't even take cash, they just needed to be sweet talked and told how hot they were. They were almost begging for our cocks! These ladies are all married and have kids but they still are hotties! We couldn't believe our success.
After seducing more M.I.L.F.'s than I can count we started building our website dedicated to sexy moms everywhere. Here normal guys like you and I could worship these beauties and watch their hardcore exploits. Come and check out our work. We have countless M.I.L.F.'s in every pose imagineable. Each M.I.L.F. has a complete photo gallery plus hardcore fuck videos. Watch them suck our cocks, take it in the ass and get fucked silly. This site was so much fun to build we want to share it with you!
Don't believe me? Come and check it out and watch our FREE movie samples. That's right, watch us seduce these M.I.L.F.'s for free. You will be as addicted as we are.
http://www.topxxx-pussy.com/milf/
You won't be disappointed. We are updating constantly, now all of our friends are on the hunt for even more M.I.L.F.'s to put on tape!
Follow our search for mom's I'd like to fuck at: http://www.topxxx-pussy.com/milf/
You'll love it!
-Tommy
posted by timothy on Tuesday, December 02, 2003
Okay, I know this is about two weeks late, but holy fucking shit, I just saw Master and Commander, and what a great movie. Seriously, if you haven't seen this yet, get off your ass right fucking now and go see it. Get out of work if you have to, just go. Honest to god, I think this might be the best war movie I've ever seen. The acting is brilliant, the writing is fantastic, the direction is great, the cinematography is just insane, the sets and costumes are great...this movie doesn't let you down on a single level. Like the Sharpe series, the setting is England vs. France during The Napoleonic Wars. Unlike the Sharpe series, the battles take place at sea and there is a large (135 million) budget which, in a rare turn of events, actually pays off. It would seem that the studio actually allowed all the money to be spent on costumes, sets, and actors (how ‘bout that shit?). There weren’t any major explosions with billowing smoke clouds and forty foot high fireballs, Russell Crowe didn’t morph into an old man, whimsically recounting his days as a sea captain, the violence wasn’t gratuitous, and not once did the film pander to the lowest common denominator. Everything “Hollywood” totally fucked off for this movie, allowing the story the time to be told well. Anyway I’ll stop verbally fellating this movie; I don’t want to start sounding like Rex Reed here. The next two hours you have to kill, go see this movie. If you don’t like it, there is something permanently wrong with you and you need to see a doctor.
posted by timothy on Tuesday, December 02, 2003
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