So a few weeks ago I woke up and the toenail of my big right toe was covered in blood.  I took a shower, cleaned it up, and went to work.  A few hours later, I looked down at it and it was still bleeding.  So I kinda freaked and cleaned it up and called the doctor and made an appointment.  I wound up canceling the appointment because two days later, it seemed fine.  And then of course, it started bleeding again.

So I cleaned the shit out of it, looked at it closely, and it seemed as tho it might be bleeding due to an ingrown nail.  I’d had an ingrown there before but had had it removed like twenty years ago.  Whatever, it seemed to be back.  So I made an appointment with the foot doctor who took care of it twenty years ago and that appointment is for the day after tomorrow.  This morning I looked down at my toe and it was covered in blood again.  I went into the bathroom and started cleaning it and it wasn’t getting any better and it was hurting like fuck.  That was about the time I woke up enough to realize the nail was completely gone.  I went back into my bedroom and there it was on the floor, sitting at the foot of the bed like an enormous, armored roach.  Fucking nasty.

So I put it in my shirt pocket so I could take pictures of it at work and put it up here, like a complete fucking asshole.  There’s just no defense for this, it’s a dick move.  That said, if you’re dumb enough to click on that thumbtoenail (hah!) above, don’t waste your time bitching at me, I’ll just mock you for looking.