Brain Spew

This is another one of those rambling, there-really-isn’t-any-point posts I seem to be so fond of lately.  And I’ll start it off by briefly saying how much I love the movie Role Models.  Maybe it’s because I was a D&D geek as a kid but goddamn that movie makes me laugh.  Jane Lynch is hysterical in it, by the way, and she’s becoming one of my favorite actors.  The thing she does with the Bagel Dog is just disturbing as hell.

Warren Ellis linked to this on his site and I like it quite a bit:

Click the picture for an explanation of what that’s all about.

The other day I looked in the mirror and saw a televangelist staring back at me, so I knew it was time for a haircut.  Unfortunately it was a Monday and my Old Fart Barber was closed.  My hair was ridiculous though, so I went to the dreaded Supercuts figuring no one could possibly fuck up shaving my entire head with a 3 clip, and I’m happy to report they didn’t.  Thank God I didn’t ask them for anything more time consuming though because the little elf girl who cut my hair apparently hadn’t showered in a week.  Which is ordinarily something just sort of unpleasant, but even sitting down, I was almost as tall as she was, which put my face right at armpit level and I swear to God, one minute longer in that chair and I’d have tipped her in vomit.

There was absolutely no reason to share that story with anyone…


Tim Hatch lives in a secret volcano headquarters somewhere in the South Pacific, where he controls the world economy and writes confessional poetry about his disappointing childhood.

His poetry has been published in MungBeing, East Jasmine Review, The Pacific Review, The Vehicle, Touch: The Journal Of Healing, Apeiron Review, and he is the recipient of the 2014 Felix Valdez Award.

He finds writing about himself in the third person to be an overtly seductive invitation to tell lies.

He once captured a French Eagle at Talavera.